Michael Gove performs NWA rap

The Conservative party have now cemented their reputation as the Gangsta rap party as pupils from six schools from across the country were yesterday given the opportunity to interview a very blinged up Secretary of State for Education and the Member of Parliament for Surrey Heath Michael Gove. As part of the highly publicised BBC […]

Anjem Choudary’s Christmas money saving tips

Hi My name’s Anjem Choudary and when I’m not preaching hate or arguing with John Humphreys on Radio 4 I like nothing more than celebrating Christmas. I’d celebrate it every single day given half a chance. I love all of it, the tree, the presents, the double episode of Eastenders but most of all I […]

Paul Flowers to present new series of Jim’ll fix it

Disgraced former Priest, Labour Councillor, charity boss and Chairman of the Cooperative bank Paul Flowers is set to present a new series of Jim’ll Fix It, according to BBC insiders. Mr Flowers who is due to be changing his first name to Jim specifically for the new position told of his excitement at bagging the […]

Lance Armstrong really Bez out of the Happy Mondays

Speaking today on BBC Radio 4 in a candid interview disgraced cycling star Lance Armstrong has finally admitted that he is also Bez out of the Happy Mondays. One furious Happy Mondays fan told us “I went to see the Happy Mondays accompanied by Bez dancing about with eyes as big as saucers and then ten […]

Over 50? You could be entitled to a free Michael Parkinson.

Are you over 50? Do you live alone? Do your family live a long way away? If so do you own a Michael Parkinson? If not would you like one? If you already own one, would you like to own another one? Well now you can as you may well be entitled to a free […]

Songs of praise to be judged by Simon Cowell

BBC1’s religious shanty programme ‘Songs of Praise’ is to now have Simon Cowell commenting after each hymn and awarding points as part of what many see as a long overdue revamp of the programme. A spokesman for the BBC told us “It should have been done years ago. The show’s been running since 1961 where […]

UKIP to put on Black and White Minstrel Show

The United Kingdom Independence party are set to go back to basics and perform a Black and White Minstrel show in an attempt to win back lost supporters according to BBC insiders. UKIP leader and sometime multi-race crooner Nigel Farararage told us “If we look back to the 1970s, there was only one foreigner in […]

BBC Apologises to pensioner for mumbling

The British Broadcasting Corporation have been forced to apologise this morning to disgruntled pensioner Edna Onions who has complained that the entire cast of every programme, drama or news item has resorted to mumbling, leaving it impossible to decipher a single word that is being said. “I think it’s disgraceful. People on television used to […]

‘All drug dealers must have licenses’ say Glastonbury organisers

Anyone expecting to arrive at Glastonbury festival with a big bag of drugs and the intention of selling them to revelers are going to have to have a license according to an announcement today from organisers. Throughout the duration of the festival anyone caught dealing without a license will be given 24 hours to apply […]

Porn star Ron Jeremy set to be the new Doctor Who

Aging skin flick actor Ron Jeremy is widely tipped to be replacing Matt Smith as the new Doctor Who according to BBC sources. Doctor Who writer Steven Moffat spoke of his excitement at the change of direction for the show.  “The new Doctor realises that having had many platonic relationships with a number of glamorous […]