The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
The home secretary Theresa May has vowed that the Government will “systematically confront and challenge extremist ideology” as she detailed new curbs on “all those who spread hate, except us.” Speaking to a packed press conference Mrs May said “It’s absolutely fine for us to demonize immigrants, poor people, single mothers and the sick and […]
A spokesman for the Home Office has apologised this morning following revelations that a number of asylum seekers were seen sipping tea from cups and wearing shirts. The news comes as some asylum seekers were ferried from London to Manchester in a Hummer, for exactly the same price to the tax-payer as a mini-bus, when […]
The heat is on the and time is right according to the campaign for Britain to stay in the European Union, who have this morning announced the appointment of none other than afternoon Euro quiz icon Henry Kelly as their leader. In his first press conference as a serious political figure Mr Kelly assured critics that […]
David Cameron has today delivered a once in a generation speech to the nation in which he urged poor people to stop being poor right now and making everyone feel guilty. Speaking at the finale of the Conservative party conference the Prime Minister said “I’m going to end poverty once and for all with this […]
Workers who measure in at under 5ft 6″ in height are not “productive” enough to warrant being paid the new National Living Wage and as a result shouldn’t get it, according to Government Minister Matthew Hancock. Speaking at the Conservative Party conference Mr Hancock said “Everyone knows that short people are less likely to change […]
George Osborne has confirmed today that all future Government meetings will be held during the night, with Ministers retreating to darkened rooms to sleep in the day time. The news will not surprise many journalists who have inexplicably found it impossible to arrange press conferences in the daytime, unless indoors with no windows, for some […]
Conservative mayoral candidate Zac Goldsmith will hand over many of his day to day mayoral duties to his butler whilst he himself engages in such activities as eating canapés, drinking champagne and fart-arsing around on his yacht, should he win the election in May 2016. Speaking to a selection of constituents at the opening of […]
Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne has silenced his critics and won widespread adoration from the public today on setting out his plans to end the epidemic of every single child having lunch at school. Speaking to a wildly cheering crowd Mr Osborne assured well wishers that the Government would face the ‘everyone having 3 […]
Popular newspaper The Sun has called for newly appointed Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn to be strung up by his curlies following revelations that he will not be voting on, discussing or even watching X Factor. Today’s edition of the paper said “One minute he’s refusing to doff his cap to the Queen. Now he’s refusing […]
A Jeremy Corbyn led Labour Government will bring back analogue TV, returning Britain to a world where you change channels with a dial whilst someone else arses about with the aerial trying in vain to get a decent picture, according to stark warnings from David Cameron. In an impassioned speech the Prime Minister warned that […]
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