The news 'they' don't want you to hear. Because it isn't true.
The entire population of Africa are set to get together and build a giant Bono by way of thanks for the singer speaking on their behalf, according to singer Bono who was speaking at the G8 summit today on behalf of the people of Africa. The speech in which the singer also announced the launch […]
I have a confession to make. About 20 years ago at a minor music festival my mate Dave and I decided to see if we could earn a bit of extra cash by performing “Didgeridoo therapy”. We would find potential punters with names like “Roman Hawkmoon”, lie them down and ask them to imagine they […]
Chubby comedian Johnny Vegas has surprised many on the world political stage by being voted in as Iran’s new president, replacing Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. After what was seemingly a shock endorsement by Iran’s supreme leader, Ayatollah Khamenei, Mr Vegas has rapidly gained the popular vote after suggesting that the entire Iranian population should spend one day […]
Anyone expecting to arrive at Glastonbury festival with a big bag of drugs and the intention of selling them to revelers are going to have to have a license according to an announcement today from organisers. Throughout the duration of the festival anyone caught dealing without a license will be given 24 hours to apply […]
It’s been another tough day for the Government, not least for Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government Eric Pickles, who saw himself this morning outed as a Russian Doll, inside which there have transpired to be a great many number of Eric Pickles. In an attack thought to be led by the English […]
The pub trade was today lamenting the end of the 2013 series of Britains Got Talent as husbands, boyfriends and male platonic live in friends throughout the country returned home from the pub this morning . Motorists faced delays of several hours as many city centres were closed today due to the staggering hoards of […]
President of the United States Barack Obama has revealed that he spends most of his time keeping tabs on US citizens and foreigners alike through a special super powered telescope that can see as far as the other side of the Atlantic Ocean, and also through walls. Responding to accusations that US Government agents are […]
Environmentalists have been protesting outside parliament in their hundreds as the temporary ban on the process of ‘Fracking’ for gas and oil looks set to come to an end. The head of a company involved in fracking has said it is ready to press on quickly with production if a UK ban on the technique […]
Power stations will be fuelled by harnessing the wrath of local communities who want to be able to use copious amounts of electricity without actually setting eyes on a wind farm or any other form of power generation. New Government legislation has encouraged local people to protest in the most vocal terms about wind farms […]
Motorists will have to punish themselves by removing points from their own licenses and inserting cash fines into honesty boxes under the new offence of ‘driving like a cunt’. Road Safety Minister Stephen Hammond said: “Cunty drivers are a menace and their negligence puts innocent people’s lives at risk. However we’ve sacked half the traffic […]
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